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Should You Discuss Going Natural With Your Partner?
Now that the natural hair movement has picked up some serious steam it’s easy to be fooled into thinking that kinks and curls are now considered the norm across the nation. But not all women of color feel comfortable embracing their natural texture or even experimenting with textured protective styles. For some the hesitation is related to fear of judgement by their families. Others cringe at the thought of uncomfortable exchanges with their co-workers and supervisors. Many flinch at the thought of learning a new routine and the accompanying lingo (TWA, ACV, EVOO it’s enough to make your head spin.) But a select few hesitate out of concern for their significant others.
Now that social media has given everyone a platform people are able to express every idea that pops into their heads. And some of those ideas are a strong “preference” for women with relaxed hair.
On the surface going natural is purely an aesthetic choice but the unpleasant history associated with hair can make it a deeply personal one-with the potential for personal consequences.
In response to an inquiry by someone writing her advice column author and relationship expert Demetria Lucas D’oley advocated for communication between partners sharing the opinion that she unequivocally did not think women had to ask permission before doing the big chop but that it would be thoughtful of them to inform their significant others so they weren’t shocked by the sudden change to their appearance.
We asked Girl & Hair Founder Camille Vevoric if she consulted with her husband and eventual business partner before making the big chop that sparked the idea that birthed her line of undercare products. “No. Not at all!” she said “I literally got home and was like ‘I’m tired of this. I’m going up the street.’ I went up there and I cut my hair and I came home. My husband is not that involved. He’s never been vocal about my style. He says as long as you love it I love it.”
Clearly her husband’s approach represents the ideal but sadly not all men feel this way. It seems every few weeks there’s an article on Clutch or Madame Noire asking whether women's styling choices are required to stay within men's comfort zones (who could forget the outrageous debate over Keyshia Kaoir’s trend setting lipstick?)
What do you think? When it comes to your hair should bae get a say?
Photo Credits: Black Enterprise, Good Housekeeping, The Source
How to Lose a Client in 60 seconds
When a hair stylist attempted to slander her client on social media she was met with a collective “oh no baby what is you doing” from the natural hair community. The “internets” did what they do and rallied the troops in defense of her unsatisfied customer attacking everything from the woman’s character to her closure. Comments ranged from the slightly dissapointed to the full on infuriated. Women couldn’t believe that a stylist would turn on her client in such a public fashion.
A staple in every community, a visit to the hair salon is sacrosanct. As a result the stylist/client relationship is a trusted one, built on a mutual investment of time and trust, but when it goes south the situation can be difficult to salvage. And once the drama is made public the same can be said for the stylist’s reputation. We’ve prepared a list of hard and fast rules to ensure you lose a client in sixty seconds that any stylist can benefit from NOT following.
Be A Chatty Patty
Clients see their stylists as part service professionals and part therapists. While they may indulge in petty gossip about their friends, family, and even fellow patrons don’t join in. Keep it cute and they’ll always trust you enough to keep coming back. This cone of silence extends to dissatisfied customers as well. No matter what was done or said make it a policy to keep news of client drama limited to relevant staff and for God’s sake DO NOT share it on the internet.
Throw Some Shade
Hair salons are generally pretty informal environments. Because of this it may feel like your client is your friend and sting when they hurt your feelings by criticizing your work or offending you in some other way. Still that’s no excuse to get snippy or sling insults. Call up your man, mom, sister, or a girlfriend if you need to vent and remember that a clean reputation is the best revenge.
Cuss Up a Storm
Save the potty mouth for off hours. No matter how well my edges are flourishing I’m not recommending you to my boyfriend’s mom if you're going to be handing out four letter words like they’re penny candy. She doesn’t want to hear that and frankly no one else does either. Having trouble following this one? Challenge yourself with a swear jar. You can give the proceeds to charity in the salon’s name.
Apply Peer Pressure
We know you think Trina would look great as red head. Trina knows you think she would look great as a redhead. All the shampoo girls and the Portuguese barbecue delivery guys know you think Trina would look great as a redhead. But Trina asked you for highlights, so give her highlights. Suggest, don’t oversell or soon Trina might be gone.
Be Tardy for the Party
Time is valuable for everyone not just those in the service industry. We all know accidents happen but if you know you’re not a morning person don’t book a 7:15 appointment and show up an hour later with coffee. Your client won’t be amused.
Embrace False Advertisement
The temptation to fake it until you make it has never been stronger than in 2017. Fear of missing out has everyone claiming to do everything. Here's a valuable secret --lying about something won't improve your skills. If you’re unable to accommodate the latest trend let your client know that you care too much to set her up for failure. Use the clean reputation you’ve maintained by not being messy to refer her to another stylist you’ve connected with and use your free time to brush up on some new techniques! Hair isn't a situation where it's cool to fake it until you make it.
Photo Credits: Healthy Black Woman, Pop Sugar, Uptown Magazine, Hello Beautiful, Bravo
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